Maybe, Slow and Steady is Just Fine

Some years ago, an acquaintance of mine had an unusual health condition that could best be cured by placing her on an intense regimen of steroids. This was done, and she got better — and larger, so quickly that her skin couldn’t keep up, and she ended up with stretch marks.

A friend of mine has generally flawless skin but the skin on her tummy has stretch-marks from her pregnancy.

It’s been said that scars are tattoos with stories; they can make the person more interesting and they’re the mark of life’s experiences. I think that the same can be said for stretch marks. However, as a result of my own life experiences, my torso, face, legs and arms already have so many scars that I don’t really want to add much more such as by having stretch marks too.

Until I pondered this point, I was feeling impatient about the rate in which my body is responding to the corrective feminizing hormones that I’m taking. My boobs and hips are slowly getting larger but wow, the key word is “slowly.” I’ve been taking the current dosage of hormones for maybe a year or so, and the net effect is that I have the shape of (I’m guessing) a 13-year old girl.  So, all other things being equal, maybe in 5 years’ time I’ll have the shape of an 18-year old girl. And since even at that age, many girls aren’t as curvy as they are in their early or mid-20s, I can look forward to my body slowly becoming more curvy over the next … maybe 12 years or so, before I can conclude that Mother Nature has (with some help from the local Walgreens Pharmacy) finally shaped me into the woman that I would have been, shape-wise, since my 20s, if I’d gone through puberty with the right hormones.

Instead of being patient, I could rush the process, but … aside from the stretch-marks issue, would that make any sense?

Granted, the last pool party I went to, I was one of the most flat-chested girls present, but maybe that’s okay. If things happened more quickly then maybe I’d just end up with stretch marks in addition to all my scars. Maybe it’s time to mellow out and stop fantasizing about instant fixes and looking curvy as soon as I can.

One of my readers chimes in with wise words every now and then to remind me how wide the gap is between my own journey and that of a genetically integrated girl. It’s sobering input. Certainly, if I speed things up, I’d be cheating myself out of more of the process I’d missed out on, as a teenager.

If I am simply patient and I keep doing what I’m currently doing, then instead of seeing my own body gradually change into a shape that I dislike (as happened when I was a teenager), I will get to see my own body gradually change into a shape that I love. That is already happening, albeit slowly, and it is a very rewarding experience. More of the same really would simply prolong the delight.

Conclusion: I should not fast-forward through that process. Instead, I should enjoy it at whatever pace such things naturally take.



2 thoughts on “Maybe, Slow and Steady is Just Fine

  1. I feel the same way lik the happening to me just aren’t happening fast enough. Il take what I can get though as I’m happy with the journey I’m on. My practitioner just doubled my Spiro prescription maybe that will help speed things along

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