Swimsuit Blonde, Me

I stayed at a Hampton Inn recently … nice people. And, I went swimming there, for the first time in many years.

When I first realized I’m basically a girl, I could stand the sight of my white, hairy, overweight male body even less.  Nor did I want to wear a male bathing suit any more. So, no more swimming after that.

However, as I started looking better, I became OK with showing off my physique. But (for now) to be busty, I have to wear bra stuffers. And, my plumbing still makes a bulge in my thong. Dangit.

And so I figured that ONE day after I’ve paid off my debts and I can go to Australia to get a new pair of boobies and to Thailand to get new, um, plumbing (assuming I ever do), then after that, I would finally be able to go lie on Waikiki Beach as who I really am, in a sexy feminine bathing suit. Maybe 10 years from now.

Imagine my delight when I stopped at a local Wal-Mart and found a promising-looking one-piece bathing suit for less than $20 and some white bikini bottoms for less than $10 each. So, I bought them. The latter, I intentionally bought several sizes too small.

When you know what to do, it’s not hard to make my type of plumbing almost vanish, and so I did. The challenge has been how to do that while wearing a swimsuit. Anyway, the plan worked. Those red stripes on the fabric would have shown off any bulges, and there were none to see. Better.

So, I went to the hotel pool, and I went swimming for the first time in many years … without having to wait yet another ten years. Yay!


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